Afterthoughts - Bargaining
by Goddess Isa
Summary: Buffy and Dawn talk


TITLE: Afterthoughts ~ Bargaining  
AUTHOR: Goddess Isa  
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com  
SUMMARY: Buffy and Dawn talk  
RATING: TV-PG  
SPOILER: Bargaining  
DISTRIBUTION: http://planetslaythis.homestead.com  
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the characters, Joss and UPN do. I just write fanfic and abuse the characters to amuse myself :)  
AUTHOR'S NOTES: I didn't write this in a forced manner, but I think it feels forced and reads forced. Feedback would be nifty.  
8/3/01  
  
  
  
"Home," Buffy muttered. She'd been saying that ever since she and Dawn made it safely off the tower. Now, walking down Revello towards their house, Buffy had almost made a mantra out of that word. Dawn wondered if she really knew where she was yet or not. She'd said a few more words, all of them confused, and she kept touching her hair, looking at it as though it were foreign.  
  
"See, Buffy?" Dawn asked, unlocking the door. "This is home."  
  
"We'll be down here, if you need us," Willow said. Dawn shot her a small smile.  
  
"Home?" Buffy asked again.  
  
"Come on," Dawn took Buffy by the hand and led her up the stairs. "See? The house still looks housey."  
  
Buffy stopped and stared at the mural on the wall. "Tara did it," Dawn explained. "It's a caricature, of all of us. She thought it was a nice way to--"  
  
"Angel?" Buffy asked in a small voice. She reached out and touched the wall gently, staring at his cartoony image. Tears welled up in her eyes, and she turned to her sister with desperation in her eyes. "Angel?" she asked again, a bit of hope in her voice.  
  
"Willow's calling him," Dawn promised. In actuality, Xander had made the call. They'd called him only after phoning Giles, telling them both to come as soon as possible and help Buffy out in any way possible. Giles had been furious with Willow--Dawn could hear him yelling at her through the phone. Angel had been silent, calm, promising to hurry over and hanging up quickly. That made Dawn angry--why wasn't he grateful?   
  
Men, Dawn had thought, I'll never understand them.  
  
"Angel?" Buffy asked, looking at the mural again, longing in her eyes.  
  
"He'll be here soon," Dawn promised again. Buffy nodded this time and let Dawn lead her into her own bedroom. She turned on the light and smiled.  
  
"See? Your room's the same as before you--as you left it."  
  
Buffy slowly sat on the bed and stared at Dawn. She bit her lip and then started to cry.  
  
"Oh, Buffy," Dawn sat beside her and smoothed her hair back. "Don't cry."  
  
"Dawn?" Buffy asked quietly. "Where am I?"  
  
"In your bedroom. You're home."  
  
"No," she shook her head fiercely. "No. Home is gone. Home is--"  
  
"Home is here," Dawn insisted. "Here with me, and with Willow and Tara. This is home."  
  
"Home," Buffy repeated, as though she were trying to get used to the concept. Her tears ceased as she looked all around the room, taking it all in again. Suddenly, she stood up and went over to the nightstand. She pulled out her journal, the fabric-covered one that Dawn had made for her, and opened it to the last entry.  
  
"What's today?" Buffy asked, looking at Dawn.  
  
"Um...."  
  
"Dawn, what's today?" Buffy asked again.  
  
"October second," she answered honestly.  
  
"This says May," Buffy held it up to show her.  
  
"I know. See--"  
  
"May!" Buffy let the journal drop to the floor. "Where.....was I?"  
  
"Heaven?" Dawn guessed.  
  
"I was......."  
  
Dawn got Buffy to sit down again and smiled at her. "Buffy, I don't know where you were. But it doesn't matter now. You're here. You're home."  
  
"I can't," Buffy said forcefully. "I can't."  
  
"It's okay," Dawn promised. "It'll be okay."  
  
Buffy nodded and continued to cry on Dawn's shoulder. Dawn glanced at the clock and sighed. Angel would be there in a few hours, and then Giles.  
  
"We'll work this out," Dawn promised in a whisper. "Everything will be fine, I promise."  
  
Buffy nodded again, but Dawn wasn't completely sure that Buffy believed her.  
  
Dawn wasn't sure she believed it herself.  
  
Buffy was dead--now she's back. Only, she's not Buffy.   
  
Is this like when Angel returned from Hell? Dawn wondered. Will she go back to being Buffy in a few weeks?  
  
Or is the Buffy I know and love gone forever?


End file.
